Pros/Cons of Destination Weddings
Who hasn’t looked at those wedding pictures and videos of couples on Pinterest or Instagram with an epic mountainscape behind them or beautiful beach sunset and had the thought, “Yeah, I want my wedding to be like that”? We already know that the pictures and videos might be enough to have you sold...but what other reasons might you want to entertain this destination wedding idea? And what factors might you want to consider before you’re all in?
6 Pros
1. Less stress
The planning that goes into destination weddings looks different from a domestic wedding in your hometown. You can relax a little more, knowing that you aren’t throwing a party for a bunch of people. Destination weddings are usually more laid back and like a vacation. If you plan for a whole weekend deal, you will be able to spend more time with all of the guests you invite, rather than feeling rushed and worried about ensuring you make your rounds to each person on your wedding day.
2. Most venues have what you need
Because you may not be able to make a quick trip to the place you are getting married, a lot of venues now accommodate couples who are wanting destination weddings. Many resorts have wedding coordinators and packages that help eliminate any need to search around an area you aren’t familiar with to find all of your vendors.
3. Your photos and video will be EPIC
The reason you might be considering a destination wedding is because of the pictures and videos you see on social media. Some of those couples look like they came straight out of a movie...And it’s literally from their wedding! Can you imagine, first of all, how amazing they must have felt taking pictures in a spot like that? There’s almost a guarantee everyone’s beauty is going to be enhanced with that amazing scenery around them. And that video--HOLY MOLY. There are so many great opportunities for a mind-blowing wedding video when you are having a destination wedding. Now, Tim and I may be biased, considering we are wedding videographers, but a lot of videographers are completely psyched when they get to join you on an amazing adventure like this. Since the nature of a destination wedding is more intimate and relaxed, there is a lot more time to get those breathtaking shots on top of the mountain, on the beach, or in the ocean. Your photographers and videographers get to know you better on the wedding day, and that is a huge help when it comes to telling your story. They know you more and can have a better idea of what your video should look and feel like. There is seriously no doubt you are totally winning in the photo/video realm when it comes to destination weddings.
4. More room for creativity and uniqueness
Unless this is you and you totally want it to be, destination weddings are usually far less traditional and are centered more around reflecting the couple and who they are. It’s refreshing because when you are planning a domestic wedding, a lot of people tend to have their input on everything you are doing. It makes it so much harder to go with your own ideas because there is always a chance of pushback from others, who really might mean well, but don’t understand that you want your day to be a little different from the norm. Destination weddings allow so much more room for you to entertain those non-traditional ideas that are brewing in the back of your mind.
5. No guest list drama
One of the hardest tasks when planning is deciding the guest list. There’s that fear of forgetting someone important, and there are always a couple of people who you invite that come with the “then I have to” clause. “If I invite so-and-so, then I have to invite the other so-and-so” and so on and so forth. And, if you have a big extended family like I do, then it is almost impossible to avoid some sort of conflict with people. Then add all of your parents’ friends who you don’t really know very well, but you feel bad saying no, and the random people you think of that you should probably invite and the size of your guest list becomes unrealistic with the budget you are planning. When you invite people to your destination wedding, it is usually just your close family and the closest friends that you want to be there. Other people don’t feel bad because they know you can’t invite the whole world, and they might not have been able to come either even if they were invited. You don’t have to worry about the possibility of forgetting someone important or hopefully stressing out about hurting peoples’ feelings who weren’t on the list. And, you can throw a party when you get back to invite all of those people who would have been on your domestic wedding list! It can be much more laid back, like a cook-out or picnic, and you don’t have to worry about any formalities.
6. More time with guests and your spouse
If you have already started planning your wedding, I’m sure you’ve heard from those who have already experienced that day. It’s one of the most important days of your life, and you always hear people say that it was amazing, but a little fuzzy; or that they didn’t get to talk or see everyone as much as they wanted to. A lot of married people also say that they didn’t even see their spouse very much throughout the day! Guest lists for destination weddings tend to be a lot smaller than a wedding in your hometown. You choose your closest family and maybe a couple of your close friends and that is your list. These are the people you enjoy to spend time with the most, and you get to spend even more time with each of them as you celebrate. You aren’t so busy trying to get around to all of your guests that you lose time enjoying the day with your spouse! You have so much more time to let the day soak in and a lot less distraction.
6 Cons
1. Paying for your guests
Depending on where you are going, the destination of your wedding may be an expensive place for travel and lodging. This is where it gets tricky with deciding what to do about who pays what. It is always a considerate gesture to pay at least for travel or lodging for a guest you are inviting. It is even better if you can pay the whole cost of each guest, but your budget may have some constraints on that, because that could really be a lot of money along with everything else! You have to decide what you and your fiance are willing to pay for each guest, and be comfortable with either paying the whole cost of each person, or asking them to pay for some of their way there. It is also a vacation for them, so I’m sure most people wouldn’t mind having a reason to get away, spend a little extra money doing it, and celebrate with you at the same time.
2. Procrastination Station is not open for this holiday
Because you are inviting your guests to a weekend they may need to call off for, you have to make sure that you get those “Save-the-Dates” out in the mail ASAP! Procrastinators be warned. If you really want some people that you know have tight work schedules to be there, you have to make sure they can plan far enough in advance for time off and to start saving if you are asking them to cover some of their own cost. Mailed out a month before the wedding? Probably not a good idea.
3. No room for forgetting anything
Remember that time when you graduated Magna Cum Laude and you forgot your medal at home on graduation day? Not a big deal, except that you may have been the only person in the group picture claiming to have a 3.9 GPA without a medal to show for it had your mom not come to the rescue and snatched up the medal at home...that might just be an “only me” story, but I’m sure I’m not the only one who tends to forget things every once in a while! When you are flying across the country to either the other side or to a completely different country, there is no going back to get that one thing you forgot. Left your garter on your bed? There might be seaweed in the Caribbean, if that’s where you're headed! I’m sure you might have a chance to quickly run to the store if you forget something simple like toothpaste or soap, but you really don’t want to forget anything important at home for your destination wedding miles away!
4. Could be risky with flights and weather
You never know what to predict when it comes to flights and weather. Having a destination wedding means you have to be willing to be a little risky and hope for the best (on-time flights and perfect weather) or be content with whatever ends up happening. This may mean if your personality type is more “go-with-the-flow,” you should be okay. However, if this type of stuff makes you super anxious, it might be a little stressful for you.
5. Your guest list is limited
How many people you invite is up to you. The more you invite, the more you will be spending. Most destination weddings are a lot smaller in number than domestic. This can be hard for those who have a really hard time narrowing down the people they want to be there. You also have to be okay with the possibility of someone you really want to be there not being able to make it since it will require time off and possibly scraping up some extra money depending on how you choose to go about it.
6. Can’t visualize it in person
Thankfully, technology, social media, and reviews have really taken a step up in helping people know what to expect when they are booking a venue. However, if you are the type of person that likes to physically see and be able to visualize exactly what a place is going to look like, it might be hard to put that trust into a venue you probably won’t go to until the weekend of your wedding. You have to trust that the consulting you do with the venue and vendors will be enough to provide you with your vision of what everything will look like. It may end up exactly the way you expect, or you may risk some things being a little different from what you envisioned.
I don’t claim to be an immediate expert on all of this stuff--I just do my research and bring it all to you with the hopes that it will save you from all that extra digging for information! Here’s where I found this info:
https://www.theknot.com/content/average-destination-wedding-cost
https://www.weddingwire.com/wedding-ideas/tips-for-planning-a-destination-wedding
https://www.cosmopolitan.com/lifestyle/a11654253/things-wish-knew-before-destination-wedding/